


Staying Fresh, Staying Cool

by slipthroughknot



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Cliche, Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-12
Updated: 2011-04-12
Packaged: 2017-10-17 23:35:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/182555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slipthroughknot/pseuds/slipthroughknot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny gets kissed a lot in one day.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Staying Fresh, Staying Cool

**Author's Note:**

> A prompt fill from the kissemdanno community at LJ, asking for "Danny keeps getting kissed by randoms during the course of their cases."

Steve finalized the list of people who had kissed Danny today in his head while trying to chase the taste of Mentos gum out of his mouth.

1) Kono, after Danny got her a half-chicken roast combo meal from Lahaina Chicken Company. All Danny bought Steve for lunch was exasperated sighs and relentless teasing after Steve had said the previous night that the white sandy beach looked pretty like a line of cocaine, if it wasn't an illegal substance. It wasn't Steve's fault his similes were crime-related. "It's not my fault my comparisons are crime-related," Steve had protested. "Look at what we do all day."

Kono gave Danny a loud, smacking kiss right on the lips and swore an oath to give Danny her first born child.

2) Grace, after an unexpected but welcome lunch visit, but before she went to her mother's arms and before Danny's smile eased into this bittersweet expression that made Steve want to punch things, tackle jaywalkers so that Danny would have something to rant about, or put his hand on Danny's knee and squeeze, a brief gesture of reassurance.

3) Mrs. Lourdes Mercado, a very grateful mother, right after Danny had reassured her that her daughter and son were safe. Mrs. Mercado wrapped her long, graceful arms around Danny, her chin touching the top of his head (she was wearing really high heels) and kissed him on the forehead. "If I wasn't married, I'd ask you out in a jiff," she said.

"I didn't know people still said jiff," Danny said, a little stunned and a lot embarrassed. Steve was insanely happy that Danny was looking up at her eyes instead of his eye level. Danny was _classy_.

"I still say jiff, and that's all that matters really," she said, and walked off to see her kids.

"Not a word," Danny said, his finger already extended and pointing at Steve.

4) Mr. Unikel, which Steve dared not mention again if he wanted his balls intact.

( _"It was a grandfatherly kiss," Steve said._

 _"He didn't have his dentures in," Danny said flatly. "It was like a non-lethal jelly fish landed on my mouth."_

 _"Oh," Steve said._ )

5) Chin. Steve would have been traumatized for life if he hadn't been so seethingly jealous. While they were rooting out who took Mrs. Mercado's kids, they stumbled upon the kidnappers and in an attempt to throw their pursuers off, Chin and Danny made out.

"Ew," Kono said, shielding her eyes from underneath the buffet table loaded with roasted pig. Steve was hypnotized by the sight in between bursts of soul-crushing envy.

"They're really going at it," Steve said. Danny's hands were under Chin's shirt, revealing the sleek lines of Chin's back. Chin's hands curled into Danny's hair, and Steve wondered if the hair crunched loudly and if Chin's hands were sticky from all the product. Danny wrapped his legs around Chin's waist and Chin started humping and Steve couldn't look anymore so he looked at the idiot kidnappers. Criminals suitably distracted, he nudged Kono and between the two of them, they knocked the kidnappers out in two kicks.

"Damn," Danny said. "You can kiss."

Steve could never hate Chin, but this was making it really, really easy.

"So can you," Chin said. "But Steve will kill me if I kiss you anymore."

"Hey!" Steve said.

"Oh don't even pretend, boss. You know you would," Kono said. "Danny, you can put your legs down now." Danny sheepishly unwrapped his legs from Chin's waist. Kono rolled her eyes and went up to Danny. "Do I have to give you the speech I give all his girlfriends?" she asked. "Hurt him and I break your legs and cut off your head and drown your decapitated head blah blah blah?"

"I'm not interested in Danny," Chin said.

"I'm not interested in Chin," Danny said. "But can you blame me for getting carried away? Look at him!"

"Ew," said Kono.

"Thank God," Steve blurted out.

All three of them looked at him, distinctly unimpressed.

"What?" he asked.

"You and I have things to talk about," Danny said, pointing that damn finger again, and Steve knew he was in trouble. He'd get Chin for that evil smirk on his face later, but he'd probably have to beat Kono there.

"I can't believe you launched Operation Jersey Seal without me," she said, punching Chin on the chest.

"Sorry, cuz. I saw a chance and took it." Chin was so smug that he was once again making it really difficult for Steve to like him.

Danny shook his head and walked around Chin. "You two can book these idiots," Danny said, pointing at the kidnappers. "This idiot and I have to talk." And he was dragged away by his tornado of a partner.

6) Steve McGarrett. After months and months of waiting, Steve took what felt like his only chance and resisted when Danny was tugging at him. He could still hear Chin and Kono bickering behind him and he was tired of the charades. He pulled Danny to him, put one hand behind Danny's head and the other on the small of his back. Steve closed his eyes and dipped down, leaned forward, kissed. Danny let out a 'mmph' of surprise before opening his mouth, and that was it -- Steve had jumped out of mountains and airplanes and they couldn't compare to this.

They eventually had to stop for air. "You taste like Mentos," Steve said.

"Chin just had one," Danny said, in a daze.

"I hate you," Steve said. He turned back and glared at Chin. "I hate you, too."

Chin just smiled and started to sing: _["Fresh goes better, Mentos freshness, fresh goes better with Mentos, fresh and full of life!"](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4hlzRNu3uE)_

THE END


End file.
